Longing
by Vespera
Summary: Trini must decide what is most important: love or friendship?


_Disclaimer: The Power Rangers belong to Saban, though I tend to borrow them on occasion._

_Dedication: This is dedicated to Trini Kwan, one of the most endearing, most under-appreciated characters to appear on "Power Rangers." Thuy Trang breathed life into this reserved, intelligent, selfless character, and she, and the Ranger she brought to life, will be missed.

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**Longing

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**

I saw him too, that day.

It was over seven years ago, but I remember it as if it were yesterday. Sleek muscles, straining beneath bronze skin as he moved. Flawless face, set in a frown of intimidating concentration as he spiritually prepared to fight the reigning champion of Angel Grove.

I watched him warm up, his body sliding so effortlessly in a kata designed for stretching. I noticed the faint gleam of sweat on his skin, the only evidence he'd already bested three of the other fine artists in the competition. His chest heaved gently, hardly winded from the three overwhelming victories.

I saw him... and I was impressed.

Now that means a lot. I've never been really into guys. At least, not like other teenaged girls tend to be. Sure, I've been attracted to a few, and I've dated a handful. Nothing serious ever developed, though; the immaturity factor of high school boys is off the scales. Plus, most boys tend to be intimidated by me. A girl who could speak her mind? Assemble a desktop computer? Render a full grown man unconscious in four seconds?

Believe me... I'm no Barbie doll.

And that's what I was like _before_ I became a Power Ranger. After Zordon called us, placing an impossibly heavy burden on our young shoulders, none of us could ever be considered "normal" again. Once I stared death in the face, I grew even more alienated from most of my peers.

It's difficult for a girl to spend her afternoons fighting tooth and nail against a seven-foot armored blue monkey, and then go home, paint her nails, and gush on the phone for two hours about the latest Hollywood "hottie."

Anyway, that left my romantic prospects limited. Of course, I was well aware that three of my best friends were attractive, reasonably mature, intelligent young men. But, they were never really prospects. Jason had been my friend for far too long to be anything other than a brother to me. Zack, for all his energy and charm, was simply too animated for my taste. And Billy... sweet, shy Billy. I adored him. But I knew I couldn't love him in that special way. A trusted friend, a confidant, a fellow "nerd"... but as strong as my affection for him ran, it never changed in nature.

I'm not saying that when I first met Tommy Oliver, I fell in love with him. Love at first sight is a ridiculous concept; despite his grace, gravity, and physique, I knew nothing else about him.

No, I didn't fall in love with him at the Martial Arts Expo. I fell in love with him later.

I can't pinpoint the precise moment it happened. There wasn't a noticeable transition in my feelings... from appreciation, to attraction, to something far deeper. But I do remember when I realized my feelings.

When my neighbor Haley was kidnapped by Lord Zedd, and taken to his private island. Ironically named for the Roman goddess of love herself, Venus.

Zordon's words had chilled my blood when he explained the magical isle. An entire body of land, that appeared on the physical plane only when summoned by Lord Zedd himself. If the island were to disappear before Haley was rescued, she would be permanently corrupted by the ancient evil.

It was obvious that capturing Haley had been a trap designed to force us onto a battlefield of his choosing. Yet we were ignorant to his true purposes when we went charging onto the island blindly.

In those days, Zedd was fixated on turning Tommy into his faithful servant. Tommy walked a line between good and evil- never able to completely purge himself of the darkness that first drew Rita to him, yet forever brightened by the light of the love his friends and family offered. He could never be one, or the other. But that didn't stop Lord Zedd from trying.

Once we arrived on the island, Zedd created a monster from one of the giant flytraps that lined the shores. He called it the Invenusible Flytrap, and true to its namesake, it lured the unwary close, and snapped its lid shut, swallowing its prey.

Tommy and I were knocked out of the way; Tommy by design, myself by coincidence. The Flytrap swallowed Kim, Jason, Zack, and Billy at once, and laid Zedd's ultimatum: either Tommy surrendered to the darkness of the isle, or the Flytrap would hold the Rangers until they were digested.

A gruesome, torturous death. The supernatural powers of the Flytrap included an industrial strength digestive system that would eat even through the impenetrable armor of our metamorphosis.

Tommy was eager to fight, to _force_ the Flytrap to release our friends. But the battle waged too long, slowly weakening the dwindling Green power.

Left with no other option, he and I retreated to the Command Center to seek Zordon's wisdom.

I had never been alone with him in such an emotionally charged situation...

oooOOOooo

The moment we materialized in the Command Center, the Green Ranger's knees buckled. On instinct I clutched his arm tightly, lending him my strength as his own had been depleted.

"Aye yi yi, Tommy!" Alpha squealed, hurrying to help us. He held Tommy's other arm, and once we were both steady, helpfully took our helmets.

"I'm sorry, Zordon," Tommy gasped, his breath heaving from the fight, "I couldn't get away."

It wasn't the first time Tommy had pushed himself past the limits Zordon set upon him. Despite his Power Coin's weakened state, he refused to be a "part-timer." He determined to stick with the Rangers as long as he could, enduring the constant leeching of his own energies by the Coin as it tried desperately to hold the imperfect Morph.

His stubbornness exasperated our mentor, as well as our leader. But instead of being upset, I was awed.

I knew that he would fight Lord Zedd with his bare hands, if it meant the lives of his friends.

"THAT IS ZEDD'S PLAN," Zordon informed us. "HE WANTS TO WEAKEN YOU, AND DRAW BOTH YOU AND HALEY INTO HIS EVIL WORLD. OBSERVE THE VIEWING GLOBE."

I turned around to the smoky globe behind me. Something in my stomach knotted as I watched Haley, the girl I baby-sat for years, lying unconscious beneath a grid of furious red energy.

Had I not taken her to the beach that morning, Zedd never would've even glanced at her. I foolishly placed her in danger, by letting our enemy learn the existence of another innocent I cared about.

"IF YOU ARE UNABLE TO RESCUE HER BEFORE THE ISLAND SINKS INTO THE SEA, SHE WILL BE LOST TO HIS EVIL WORLD... FOREVER."

It was a credit to my years of kung fu training that I was able to hide my torment. I wanted to vomit, my shame and guilt seizing my body.

"That can't happen, Zordon," I murmured, restrained tears causing my voice to waver. Unconsciously, I maintained my tight hold on Tommy's arm... only now, I was leaning upon _his_ strength.

That wasn't the first time someone I loved... someone completely incapable of defending herself, had been kidnapped to use against me. First, my little cousin Sylvia was attacked by Rita's clown monster, who cast a spell turning her into a two-dimensional statue. True, Billy's dependable brilliance broke the spell, but it always gnawed at the back of my mind... she never would've been endangered had I never accepted the Yellow Coin. And there was no way to discern whether the spell had any permanent effects Billy simply couldn't predict.

Then, that anguished afternoon of Parent's Day, when Rita kidnapped my mother and father, as well as all the parents of the other Rangers, and every other family that had attended the festivities. With tears in even Jason's eyes, we surrendered our Power Coins to Goldar, only to be betrayed as the gold monster laughed in our faces, and proclaimed the imminent deaths of the men and women who gave us life.

If Tommy hadn't returned, and hadn't taken a serious risk by allowing Zordon to temporarily restore the Green Coin, we would have lost everything that day.

Tommy...

He always came through when we needed him. Just at the right moment, he'd find a way out of Rita or Zedd's traps, and run headlong into battle, willing to take any risk to save us.

It amazed me how self-conscious he was in social situations, yet how confident he could be in the face of even the most fearsome alien creature.

"Then there's no other choice," he decided, walking out of my arms toward Zordon. "I have to take Haley's place."

I should have known he'd suggest that. He knew Zedd's ultimate goal was to restore the Green Ranger to his formerly evil glory. And he would willingly subject himself to the violation of his spirit and mind that had haunted him for months after we first freed him from Rita.

I couldn't let him go so easily. Something inside me just _wretched_ at the thought of Zedd destroying all that Tommy accomplished... all for my mistakes.

That... and the unsettling realization that I would never recover from such a loss.

"No, Tommy," I spoke, in a tone that brooked no argument. "There has to be another way."

"What do you have in mind, Trini?" Alpha wondered.

I gazed at the helpful robot, as well as the mentor that shaped the past year of my life. For some reason, I knew I couldn't look at Tommy. "Alpha, Zordon... I'll fight alone."

He reacted without hesitation. "Alone? Trini, you'll end up with the others!"

I stared at him. If anyone else had said that to me, I would've been insulted that he had so little faith in me. But I knew better than to doubt Tommy. I knew he respected, and was even sometimes awed, by what I could accomplish. On many occasions he had complimented my unique style, allowing my natural grace and honed skill to compensate for my lack of physical strength and size.

"There's only one thing left for me to do. And we all know what that is."

And then, he hugged me.

We had hugged before, swept up in the thrill of victory after a difficult fight. I never thought anything special about it, though I always enjoyed the brief moment when his arms wound around my back.

But this time, it lingered. The contact lasted perhaps three full seconds, but it stretched into eternity for me.

I held him close, one arm around his neck, the other around his back. In stark contrast to a typical hug between a man and a woman, his head was cradled in my shoulder, forcing him to bow to my height. And I felt the slightest tremble, letting me discern that he was just as terrified as I was.

That moment froze in time. I memorized the line of his face, the musky scent of his sweat, the feel of his arms around my back, the tickle of a few stray hairs against my cheek.

And when we broke apart, I longed to hold him again. That's when I finally realized just how deeply my admiration... my _love_... for Tommy ran.

"Tommy," Alpha called. For once, his tinny voice sounded choked. "Here."

He handed Tommy the green helmet, like a squire arming a knight for battle.

He was the noblest of us all; is it any wonder I had fallen in love with him?

Tommy held his helmet in the crook of one arm, and gazed up at Zordon, the counselor that believed in him so strongly, he risked death by restoring the Green Coin to active duty. "Look, I promise I'll try to resist Zedd, but I don't know if I can."

He then turned to me, a deep sadness in the dark gaze that had never made me weak in the knees... until that moment.

"And if I ever come back..." He choked on his words. "If I hurt _any_ of you... tell them for me... I'm sorry."

I just couldn't take it any longer... the tears I'd been fighting back just overflowed, showing the entire world how this was ripping me apart.

I wanted to scream at him. I wanted to force him to reason. There just _had_ to be another way! We'd faced so many trials before, but we _never_ sacrificed a Ranger! We always found an alternative!

But his gaze held me... a grave, sad grin on his face... and I couldn't get a single word passed the lump in my throat.

He reached his hand to me, and I clutched it desperately, turning away from the hypnotizing eyes that rendered me speechless and nearly immobile.

After an endless moment, he dropped his hand from mine, and prepared to teleport.

Then, just before Tommy vanished from the Command Center... and from my life... a computer began beeping.

"Wait a minute!" Alpha urged, pulling sheets that printed from the computer, "What's this?"

Tommy and I waited in silence... though I noticed his proximity as he crept behind me. If I took a half-step back, I could lean my head against his broad chest.

"The computer has been analyzing the Invenusible Flytrap, searching for any weakness."

We remained in muted anguish as Alpha perused the data on the sheet. Then, after a long suspense, he squealed one word: "Heat!"

"OF COURSE; THE VENUS FLYTRAP CANNOT WITHSTAND HEAT."

"So if the others create heat while inside the monster..." I turned to Tommy, taking his hand, "..they might be able to escape."

Tommy's hands gripped mine with matching enthusiasm. "It's our only chance."

My heart racing, I reached for my helmet, then laid my free hand on his shoulder. "Let's go!"

oooOOOooo

The plan worked. We managed to express to our friends the idea of using heat against the monster, and they mercilessly attacked the creature's stomach walls with the heat generated from the Power.

Tommy and I watched the Flytrap double over as the attacks took affect, and joined the assault from outside. Sickened to the extreme, the Flytrap released the other Rangers, none the worse for wear.

We finished him off with our combined weapons, raced across the sinking isle, and rescued Haley. Thank God no one was hurt.

No one... except me.

After the excitement faded, and we separated for the evening, I was finally able to process everything I was feeling.

It amazed me how Tommy's hug had made my heart flutter. How his mournful grin reduced me to tears. How his strong arms seemed to invite me into them. How my stomach flipped at the thought of him leaving us.

I remember trembling that night, despite the warmth of the evening. How could I let it happen? How could I fall in love with my best friend's boyfriend?

Kimberly had been attracted to Tommy from day one. It was painfully obvious to the rest of us, but it took Tommy a few months to realize it. And he felt exactly the same for her... if not more so.

If Kimberly hadn't been rendered speechless at their first encounter, I probably would've taken the first opportunity to introduce myself.

That night was pure torture, as I laid my feelings bare for contemplation. I realized I'd loved Tommy for some time. I acknowledged that, while we had traded a few furtive glances and shy smiles, what I felt for Richie paled pathetically in comparison to the way Tommy captivated me. Perhaps, unconsciously, I was trying to find someone else to offer my affections to... someone that _wasn't_ involved with my best friend.

It was hopeless. I knew that day that what I felt for Tommy wasn't fleeting. It had been building, from the day we met. For, while I first took notice of his gorgeous face and powerful body, I grew enamored with his shy charm, endearing faults, dependable strength, endless determination, and boundless loyalty.

I knew I loved him... and I couldn't do a thing about it.

For Kimberly was more than my best friend. She was the sister I never had. The trusted friend who urged me to let my hair down once in a while. The friendly stranger who immediately welcomed me to Angel Grove at the awkward age of ten, eagerly praising my long hair and neat handwriting. The girl who invited me to join her and her friend Jason to play Frisbee... and the rest, is history.

I never thought anything could ever come between us. We stuck together through puberty, first crushes, middle and high school, and even life or death battles against evil aliens.

But never before had we both set our eyes on the same guy.

I couldn't fall asleep, so at the ungodly hour of two a.m., I just stopped trying. I switched on my desk light, and grabbed the nearest pad and pencil. Clutching Ticklesneezer for moral support, I made a list.

All the reasons I could never, _ever_ act upon my feelings for Tommy.

One: He loved Kimberly.

Two: Kimberly loved him back, with incredible maturity for a teenaged girl.

Three: Kimberly's friendship meant the world to me.

Four: If any hostilities were to develop, the entire team would be in jeopardy.

Five: I have no reason to believe he felt anything other than friendship for me.

Six: Lord Zedd might somehow discover my feelings, and use it against us.

Seven: If I even admitted it to anyone, I'd place an intolerable burden on my friends.

Those seven were more than enough to lead me to a resolution: put it behind me.

After all, I was far more disciplined than most girls my age. How difficult could it be?

I managed to fall asleep finally, lulled by that comforting conclusion... though in the days that followed, I realized my mistake.

No matter how rational my mind was, my heart was just as untamable as everyone else's.

The following few weeks were a nightmare. I tried my best to stay away from Tommy entirely, and to a lesser extent, Kim herself. For in Tommy's company, I feared my feelings would only be enhanced. And I feared that Kimberly's uncanny insight into the hearts of others would leave my pain naked before her. I didn't want her pity, advice, or far worse... her mistrust. I couldn't stand to have Kimberly doubt my friendship, by thinking I had some designs on her boyfriend.

Thankfully, I found a perfect escape: the Peace Conference.

I signed up for the program far more eagerly than I should have. While I was always dedicated to doing my part for the world, I had a very personal, very sensitive reason to put as much distance between myself and Angel Grove as possible.

It was painful... but it was best. And when I found out that I'd been selected, I was relieved. Not overjoyed... just relieved.

The two-year program would surely give me enough time to forget.

And it did. My schedule quickly immersed me in challenging courses, interactions with hundreds of interesting people from as many nations, trips throughout Europe, and enlightening debates on world matters like poverty, injustice against women, hunger, epidemics, and quelling the flames of division between so many nations.

Most importantly, I wasn't alone. I had Jason and Zack; two wonderful, loyal friends that made me enjoy my time in Switzerland even more.

Over time, my longing for Tommy dulled to a mild ache. Even an awkward, rather embarrassing memory. A continent and an ocean separated us... and while I did maintain close contact with Billy and Kimberly through letters, I never wrote to Tommy.

Then, Kimberly went to Florida, and her letters grew more and more seldom. I never took it personally; I could only imagine how much effort went into preparing for the Pan Global Games. One representative from Luxembourg had been a Pan Global swimmer, and his stories of the commitment necessary reminded me of military training.

As Kimberly's best friend, I had to understand her situation, and support her. After her first Christmas in Florida, the only correspondence I had was a brief Christmas card.

As such, I knew next to nothing about her love life... until I received the most unnerving call of my life.

oooOOOooo

It was just after noon in Geneva, and I was reclining in the small apartment I shared with my Russian roommate Anastasia. After a grueling session of exams, I had decided to take a short break from academics before the afternoon session.

I had just gotten comfortable, the latest Michael Crichton novel nestled between my knees, when the phone rang.

"Hello?"

_"Trini, it's Tommy."_

Frankly, if he didn't tell me his identity, I would never have guessed. I blinked in surprise, my usually sharp mind swimming in molasses as I considered his exhausted voice, and calculated what ungodly hour it had to be in California.

Needless to say, my heart practically stopped. I dropped my book, leaning forward in the chair as if I was ready to spring into action. "What's going on?" I demanded.

He must have heard the urgency in my voice, and figured out the train of my thoughts. _"Don't worry, it's not an emergency."_ That was the code we used back in our mutual Ranger days, as we were tried to be cautious of eavesdroppers.

"Oh." I visibly relaxed. "So, what can I do for you? I haven't spoken to you in months."

Well, it had been over a year, actually.

_"Uh... are you alone?"_

"Yeah, my roommate's in the cafeter-"

I completely lost my thought, dropping the phone from my hand as suddenly, a storm of red energy erupted to life just six feet away.

I couldn't keep the shock from registering on my face. There he was, the man whose face still haunted my dreams on occasion, in the flesh.

What could be so horrible, he'd risk _teleporting_ halfway across the world to my apartment?

I slowly recovered my senses as he looked down at me, a sheepish grin on his lips, but a haunted cloud hanging over his eyes.

I tried to be glib. "_So_... isn't this your first international trip?"

His lips quirked a little more. "Nah, I went to Australia on a class trip last year." One hand unconsciously rubbed the back of his neck... a nervous reaction I'd seen before... and his other gripped a piece of paper.

His eyes were bloodshot, and his pallor was unsettling.

Tommy had never been one to hide his feelings, and now they were on display for me alone. He was nervous, anxious, and desperate... and he sought my help.

My heart ached for him, and in an instant, all the healing I'd achieved over our fourteen month separation was shot straight to Hell.

I sighed inwardly as I rose to my feet. Gently, I laced my arm through his, and let him lean upon my strength... just as I had done that day in the Command Center.

I led him to the small table near the kitchen. "Have a seat. I'll make you some tea."

He offered a wan, but grateful, smile, and sat.

In a daze, I prepared a pot of tea. Every so often, I turned around, to steal a glance at the formidable Red Zeo Ranger.

He seemed to be entranced by a piece of paper. He clenched it between both hands, the worn creases giving me the impression that it had been folded, unfolded, and refolded often.

My curiosity piqued, I poured two mugs of steaming tea, and settled them on the table. I then slid into the seat across from him, and watched him straighten the folded edges of the paper he held.

"I'm sorry I just dropped in like this," he sighed, "I... I have an issue I really need to deal with. I was hoping I could get your take on it."

I answered with a small, encouraging smile. "You have my full attention."

"I... uh... I got this in the mail the other day."

He then slid the sheet toward me. I met him halfway across the table, taking a slow sip of my own tea as I skimmed the letter.

A letter from Kim. Everything's going great, yadda yadda, ready for the competition, yadda yadda, met someone else...

Wait...

"_What_?"

I nearly choked on my tea. Forcing down the hot liquid in a single gulp, I turned my incredulous gaze to Tommy.

He chuckled weakly at my expression, his finger drawing circles along the edge of his mug. "I guess you didn't see this coming, either."

I only shook my head, waiting for my tongue to loosen. No wonder Zordon let him use the teleporter for "personal gain." There's nothing more dangerous to the Rangers than letting their leader operate in such a disturbed state! I wouldn't be surprised if Zordon _suggested_ that Tommy work through this sudden... and completely unexpected... personal emergency.

Finally, I recovered the ability to speak. "Tommy," I murmured, my eyes reading the letter once again, "I don't know what to say."

Tommy took a sip of his tea, giving himself a moment to collect his thoughts. "I was hoping I could get a different perspective from you," he revealed. "You and Aisha were Kim's closest friends. Aisha's completely out of contact in Africa, and none of the current Zeo Rangers have even heard from Kim in months. Except me... obviously."

"Obviously," I breathed.

"Anyway... I just don't get it. Kim never mentioned anything like this before. Sure, she told me about the pressure she's under, but I never got the impression she was hiding anything from me. And now... this."

He took a deep, cleansing breath. "People don't just fall in love in two weeks. What happened between this letter, and the last one she sent me?"

I found myself unable to meet his gaze. "Sometimes, people are brutally honest with themselves. About their feelings, about their hopes, about their relationships. And sometimes, in those moments, epiphanies are reached that change everything."

I felt his stare upon me. I nearly shivered at its intensity.

I needed to get away from it.

"L... let me think about this for a few minutes, Tommy," I requested, rising from the table. "I've got some... old letters from Kim. I'll take a quick look, but I don't think she ever mentioned another guy."

I knew his eyes followed me as I retreated into the relative safety of my small bedroom.

Once I was cloistered inside, I hugged myself tightly, fighting the trembling of my skin.

_Oh God, oh God! Kimberly **dumped** him! She... she did!_

It was so hard to believe, I actually pinched myself. I never even entertained the possibility that anything could wedge itself between them.

They always seemed the perfect couple. They'd do anything for each other! Kimberly told me, in great detail, of the time Tommy broke into Zedd's own sanctuary to save her life. He even faced Zedd himself, in a one-on-one duel, to free her from the dark Lord's clutches!

How could she possibly find someone who could match that kind of love?

I was puzzled, overwhelmed, and, I'm ashamed to admit... hopeful. Hopeful that if Kimberly had moved on, I actually had a shot at Tommy.

My list came to mind, from over a year ago.

One: He loved Kimberly... well, he clearly still did, but that would change with time and patience.

Two: Kimberly loved him back... that had been proven false.

Three: Kimberly's friendship meant the world to me... it still did, but now there was no conflict.

Four: If any hostilities were to develop, the entire team would be in jeopardy... I was no longer a Ranger, and I couldn't imagine the others having a problem now.

Five: I had no reason to believe he felt anything other than friendship for me... true, but since he didn't have another love, I could find out.

Six: Lord Zedd might somehow discover my turmoil, and use it against us... Lord Zedd wasn't an issue any longer, and from my understanding, the Machine Empire didn't have the intimate understanding of human emotions necessary to twist this to their advantage.

Seven: If I even admitted it to anyone, I'd place an intolerable burden on my friends... not necessarily, as no one would be forced to choose sides.

I was halfway to a decision to confess the truth, when out of nowhere, my conscience burned from within the well of denial into which I tossed it.

How could I even _consider_ laying such a thing upon Tommy now? He was so crushed by Kimberly's letter... I couldn't take advantage of it.

He came to me for advice. No one knew Kim as well as I did... not even him, apparently. I was confident that, whatever I suggested, he would take into serious consideration.

I had a great deal of power in my hands. I could advise him to move on... or I could advise him to take a chance.

What would I do?

The real question was, what would I do _for him,_ and _for her_?

The man I knew I loved dearly, and the sister I cared for even more.

I gnawed my bottom lip anxiously. I knew the only honorable... only _loyal_ course of action. The only course of action completely unblemished by selfish longing.

Glancing at my watch, I quickly calculated what time it was in Miami.

"Let's see... California is nine hours behind, and Miami is three hours ahead of that... so seven a.m."

Kimberly awoke with the dawn. One of the most hated parts of her training, she always complained.

With an unsteady hand, I lifted the phone beside my bed. I didn't think about the cost of making an international call. I didn't even figure out what I was going to say to her.

I hoped Kimberly would guide the way.

After a few pulses, someone picked up. _"'lo?"_

I put on a false smile, in an effort to keep my voice light. "Renee? It's Trini. Did I wake you?"

Kimberly's roommate sighed. _"I was awake. Didn't get much sleep."_

I swallowed. "Is Kim... okay?"

Another long sigh. _"She's a mess, Trini. She's **been** a mess for days!."_

Probably from the moment she wrote that awful letter.

"Is she sick?"

_"I don't know what the hell's wrong with her! She won't tell me anything!" _The young woman huffed in frustration; in many ways, her outspoken personality reminded me of Kim. _"I guess the stress of the Games is finally getting to her. The Coach really chewed her out last week... something about her lack of focus. But he's hard on her all the time... she's probably got more talent in one finger than most of us do in our entire bodies! Goes with the territory, ya know?"_

I nodded, despite the fact she couldn't see me. Slowly, a pretty feasible explanation formed in my mind.

_"Anyhow, she just broke down, muttering some nonsense, and has been completely inconsolable ever since. She kinda switches between a sobbing mess, and then a cold robot. She still makes it to every single practice, doesn't offer a single complaint when the Coach yells at her, and runs through the motions like she's been programmed."_

Then she paused. _"I think she's been kidnapped by aliens, and replaced by some clone in an effort to sabotage the U.S. team."_

I offered a weak laugh. "Doubtful, Renee. You think I could talk to her? Maybe cheer her up a little?"

_"Actually, she's not in now. She went out extra early for a jog. She's been doing that for the past two weeks... Jeez... it's not even **light** out when she leaves! Want me to tell her you called?"_

I didn't hesitate. "I wanted to make sure she'd be around today. Tommy told me he was going to drop in on her. You know, a surprise visit."

Renee squealed over the phone. _"Wow, those two must have some kind of psychic connection! She was so upset last week, with all the stress, and she couldn't reach Tommy over the phone. I guess he's been busy with midterms or something."_

I couldn't help a wry grin at that. Most likely, there'd been a twenty-story robot trying to flatten Angel Grove, and perhaps an exam or two on top of that, just for good measure; but surely Kim could understand that, right? Or was the stress really getting that difficult to manage?

I shook out of my musing enough to reply. "He got a disturbing letter from her, and got a little worried."

_"I'd believe it. She's been really irrational... it's been scary. Sure he can come by! Our practice runs 'til five today, and then we're free for the evening. If he can book a flight this morning, he should be able to make it in plenty of time. I'm sure she'd love to see him."_

"Thanks for your help, Renee. And be sure to tell Kim to call me some time, would you?"

_"You got it. Later, Trini!"_

"Bye."

I settled the phone on its cradle, my fingers slowly releasing it. I breathed slowly, absorbing all the information I had collected and piecing it together into a credible picture.

_She's overworked, and under stress. The Coach is putting pressure on her to put her every effort into the Games. She's the best hope for the medal. And when she needed Tommy the most... he was unavailable. So, she wrote that stupid letter..._

Kim was always so sensitive. Combine that with unusually stressful circumstances, and it wasn't hard to believe she wrote the letter in a huff of outrage.

_She's regretting it now. I can just see it. She wishes she could take it back, but now it's too late. Or... maybe it's not._

My decision was made. And it was final. Before my selfish heart could even attempt to rationalize, excuse, or deny what I knew to be the best decision, I stepped out of my bedroom.

Tommy was hunched over the mug of tea that had stopped steaming. It had chilled before him, almost completely untouched.

"Tommy... you need to talk to Kim."

He glanced up, and fixed me with a mortified stare. He didn't need to say what was on his mind; I could read it all over his face.

He was scared that the woman he loved would hurt him even _more_ in person. It must have crossed his mind to pay a visit to Florida; but his insecurity made him hesitate.

His insecurity made him come see me instead.

He came for my insight, and that's exactly what I'd give him. And I'd hold back nothing. "I told you before: sometimes, people are brutally honest with themselves. Now it's your turn. Tommy, do you love Kimberly."

He answered immediately. "Yes."

"Do you want to know what went wrong?"

"Yes."

"Then _talk_ to her, face to face. No letters, no phone calls... just you and her, with nothing to filter your words or hide behind."

It's actually painful to look Tommy in the eye right now, so I avoid it, looking just over his shoulder. "Look, the truth is, I haven't spoken to Kim in months. She's practically a prisoner in that gym, surrounded by acquaintances rather than the friends she loves. She's under far more pressure than she's accustomed to, without the support of her friends and family."

I rubbed my forehead, leaning against the wall. "I think she needs you, so much she's scared of it. She needs you _now_, Tommy... and you need to go see her."

Tommy's face gradually collapsed into a frown, letting me see understanding slowly dawn upon him. "You mean, _right_ now?"

I nodded emphatically. "Why not?"

"I can't just gothere!"

I smirked. "You just came here, didn't you? I'm sure Zordon will let you drop in on Kim."

His gaze fell back to the mug. "But, what if...?"

"You're stalling," I pointed out, "If anything happens while you're gone, you're a communicator beep away."

I approached him, heart twisting at the stricken expression on his face. Gently, I laid my hand on his strong shoulder.

"I've known Kim a long time," I murmured, squeezing the muscle, "I've been there for all her other boyfriends. And she never broke up with any of them in such a cold way. I'm sure there's more to this than what's written in that letter. And if you love her... if you _really_ love her... you've got to face her."

Then, I glanced at my watch. "You've got about ten hours to kill before Kim's practice for the day is over. Want some breakfast? I can make some pretty decent scrambled eggs."

He grinned... this time, the amused, relaxed grin I remember so well. "Thanks, but I've got some thinking to do."

He rose from his seat, and before I could even prepare myself, he wrapped me in his strong arms.

I felt myself shiver, screwing my face in an effort to withstand the power his embrace had on me. Then, I slowly returned it, patting his shoulder blade.

"You're the best, Trini. I owe you."

And with that, he was gone.

I sighed deeply, and sank into the chair he had vacated. Straining to keep my hand from shaking, I reached for the cup of tea he left, swallowing the lukewarm brew slowly. And slowly, I regained the calm demeanor I've always been known for.

oooOOOooo

Tommy visited Kim that evening. I made sure of it; not only did I call Tommy's house at four (which translates to one a.m. in Switzerland), I even called Billy, and updated him on my advice. If Tommy did back down at the last minute, I was confident that Billy would program the teleporter himself, and send him to Florida, ready or not.

Kim called me the following day, and thanked me.

I knew then, if I hadn't intervened - if I hadn't inserted the possibility of reconciliation into Tommy's stubborn, self-deprecating cranium - he never would've gone to Florida. He never would have forced a confrontation. He would never have learned the truth.

He never would have married her.

And now, on a sunny Saturday afternoon five years later, I stare down the isle at the altar, dressed in a muted yellow gown. Tommy stands on one side, anxiously knotting his fingers, and Jason is behind him, a wide smile on his face.

The wedding march begins, and the two hundred attendees all pivot, watching the bridal party slowly walk down the aisle. Kimberly is simply radiant in her flowing gown... the princess she'd always dreamed of being.

Tommy's face just lights up as he sees her.

Cameras flash in my eyes as I watch her approach the altar. Tears cloud my vision, a serene smile on my face as I watch my best friend take the arm of the man she loves.

Of the man we both love.

Yet my smile is genuine, despite the knowledge that I missed my chance.

Kimberly has made him happy, during the years of their teenaged fairytale romance, to their young adulthood's deeper bond, to the dizzying activity of their eight-month engagement. And now, Kimberly will make him happy for a lifetime.

_Only_ Kimberly can make him truly happy. I'm sure of that now.

As for me... I will love again. I know I will.

**The End**


End file.
